When You Care Too Much About What Others Think of You

When You Care Too Much About What Others Think of You

We’re always striving for clarity and consciousness. What does it mean to be conscious? Consciousness is awareness. The state of awareness is what we’re often working toward through meditation and mindfulness. Obtaining it isn’t always easy; we often use helpful “hacks”, like singing bowls, to access and enhance this state.

Are You Chronically Self-Conscious?

However, not all consciousness is healthy. Being excessively self-conscious, for instance, can be incredibly limiting. Sure, we all have moments when we feel a little insecure. But sometimes, we can become absorbed with what others are thinking of us.

Suddenly, we replay every conversation and comment over and over in our minds. We scrutinize facial expressions and modify our appearance or behavior. And for what? So that others may view us favorably. It makes us feel good and valuable to be liked and approved of.

Isn’t It Good to Care?

Of course, caring what others think can be considerate and socially very healthy. We finish our work, send cards, style our hair, do the dishes, and pay for a friend’s meal all because we care. So how do we know when it’s gone too far and has become a sign that we’re insecure?

First, look at your general standing in life. Where you live, your job, your school, your hobbies. How many of these factors were put into place because it’s what you wanted?

You may have made a sacrifice somewhere, sure. But chronically self-conscious people often realize they are so when they face the fact that their life choices revolve around what others think.

Another sure sign involves a little verbal tic - “I’m sorry”. If you feel a constant need to apologize for yourself when you’ve objectively done nothing wrong, take a step back.

Ways to Care Less

If you find that you do care too much, how do you begin changing this? Building good self-esteem can be a lengthy and very personal task, but here are a few ways to begin living for yourself - unapologetically.

  • Meditate. We love the way meditation can shift our perspective. Make meditation a daily practice, and you may start to see that there’s no reason to fear someone else’s opinion. Furthermore, it helps us let go of negative thought patterns that feed our insecurities.
  • Reevaluate. We don’t always get so self-conscious all on our own. Are there specific relationships that trigger feelings of unworthy and insecurity? It may be time to distance yourself from these people, so you can heal.
  • Self discover. You’ve been living for the approval of others. Now comes the fun part: learning what it is that makes you happy. After all, you can’t live for yourself if you don’t know yourself.
  • Be uncomfortable. How would you speak, live, and look if no one else could judge you? Experiment with living as though your opinion is the only one that matters. It can be a little nerve-wracking at first, but chances are, you’ll discover that others aren’t as critical of your every move as you feared.


    What makes you feel self-conscious? Do you have any tips for overcoming excessive worry over what other people think? Share below in the comments, and check back soon for more.


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